Our God Hanuman resides at Bhagawan Anjaneya temple, Thanneer Thurai, Mylapore. He is affectionately referred to as Thanneer Thurai Anjaneya by the crowded folk of Mylapore, and the younger generation call him Luz Anjaneyar. He gets millions of religious hellos everyday, as He is one of those rare Gods who are visible from the main road. Thousands of Mylaporean uncles and aunties would actually consider it a godsend if their bus breaks down in front of the temple. (Rather than get down from the bus and take the next one, they can be seen sitting inside, making an "O" and slapping their cheeks). My brother and I have always done the customary cheek tap every time we pass the Bhagawan. And it had got so customary that it had become an involuntary reflex spirituo-magnetic reaction. I had at one time, shouted out "Hi da machan" at the temple involuntarily, and that has been told and laughed over more times than was funny. It is these days of celebration at the Thanneer Thurai Anjaneyar's that we get to renew our faith, so to speak.
Anjaneyar's birthday was on 8th January, and his father the God of Wind was very excited and was blowing stuff everywhere with some brisk gusto. There was fun in the air and the Mylaporeans were psyched. Almost all of the gentry wore half a bottle of Charlie Handkerchief Perfume on their shirts and were up for a visit to the temple. As usual there was a colossal traffic mayhem, and the friendly neighborhood cop couldn't do much as his tummy was contributing to traffic jam in itself. There was the usual tube-lighting extravaganza up to where Amar's Traders used to be, replete with exposed wires and open sockets. But what was spectacular was the audio systems. There were the huge industrial strength loudspeakers right outside the temple playing Bombay Jayashree so loud that her folk in Bombay would have sat up and said, "Yaen dee ma, Jayashree vandhurukkaa pola irukkae?" if you get my drift.
And yours truly had to recharge his prepaid SIM card.
And the recharging shop was right next to the temple, exactly where the loudspeakers were.
So I put on a brave face, and walked up to the shop admiring the awesome celebrations that were underway at the temple. As I neared the shop, the music got louder. At a point where I thought that physics was being bent to actually make sound louder, for if sound had got any louder it would have become light. I didn't want to flinch as I was in no mood to appear like an outsider. As I stepped into the shop I noticed an eardrum rolling away, and some steam come out of the ear it belonged to. But I didn't look concerned, the stalwart that I am. I strummed my vocal chords once and screamed at the top of my voice, "6 months rechaaarge". The shopkeeper looked at me with a bland expression, his face looked like death, and I could see his pupils pulsing to the beat of the mridangam. He then slid a notebook towards me and gestured at me to write in it. I wrote the details and handed him the moolah. He punched in the data and I got a confirmation message, and my phone was vibrating even though I had the vibration turned off. Everytime Bombay Jayashree drew in her breath, it sounded like a typhoon was on us. The most amazing thing was two aunties were actually carrying on a conversation right in front of the loudspeaker assembly. I really feel sorry for their husbands, were they ever to say, "Talk dirty to me baby, scream some." But we have grown more mature than this, and such things don't surprise us much, anymore.
Anyway, I beat the hasty retreat and crossed the road to take a picture of all the glory from my cellphone camera. That done, I did some customary cheek taps, reconfirmed our pact with Lord Hanuman about him protecting me from all evils, and giving me untold wealth and prosperity, in return for my priceless cheektaps and an the occasional "Budhirbalam Yashodhayryam.." sloka.
Due to the sound bombardment, the iron in the Panchaloha idol near the base of Lord Hanuman, would have achieved accelerated fatigue and would have dissipated transforming it into a Chathurloha Venugopala Swami. Not to mention my God Hanuman himself would have become stone deaf in his right ear, (his left ear would retain 10% hearing, as he faces south all the time). From now, I guess I would have to write down all my requests for tremendous happiness and wealth.
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